Sunday, September 14, 2008

The Hitchhikers Guide to "Kill An Awesome TV-Series"

There are a few points you should follow when you want to ruin an awesome series:

Step 1. Put Quantity Over Quality
Don't plan a season with 20 to 30 episodes. Even better, why bother with splitting the whole thing in seasons. Keep it like the telenovelas and release one episode per day, that makes a total of about 250 episodes a year. And the telenovela genre is the best example for poor quality. They suck.

Step 2. Change An Awardwinning System
Ok, you did something right and your series is running very well. You start winning some awesome awards with it and everything works perfectly. Than you should consider firing your scriptwriter and hire an third year english student from Banglapoor/India to write your scripts from now on.

Step 3. Rotate the Cast
The channel you're producing for is gracious and you are allowed to contine your work. Your new scriptwriter learned to write good stories and the audience starts to like your show again. They also like your current cast. They start to identify themselves with your main characters. What you should do now is leave your characters but change the cast for them. You know what I mean. In the show, it's still the same character but it is played by another person. Very confusing... and also very popular in daily soaps.

Step 4. Minimize Your Geographic Expansion
Wow, your show still rocks. And you planned to expand a little bit, make a bit more money by airing your show also in the german speaking countries. That's the best thing you can do. It's like throwing money into the fire while a bunchload of wood lies next to the fire place. Translations and synchronisations are only expensive and most of the time, let's be honest, just crap. Best example for this lately: HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER - GERMAN. The voices are rediculous and the translations are just wrong.

Here is the example. The video quality is also crap, that is just because the guy who made the video filmed this with his digi cam. But security business first. Before you watch this make sure you've got a bucket or something in your range. Just in case you have to throw up.
And the last thing before you watch this... You will never ever watch How I Met Your Mother with the same awesome experience. This crap burns into your brain and will never go away.
So, watch it at your own risk.
Example - Extremely dangerous

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